Giving Boys the Best Chance to Succeed

As the school year approaches I have been reflecting on how to build on our approach to support the boys to ‘be the best they can be’.

Over the years Wellesley has built a reputation for having a distinct teaching and learning approach which caters for boys’ distinct set of needs. This is underpinned by the belief that the curriculum needs to be pitched in a way which will engage the boys away from the rote and the procedural into the higher levels of thinking. Now is not the time to expand on this but talk about some other key elements which are even more fundamental in bringing out the best in boys.

Many of you will know the work of Billy Graham who started NaeNae’s Boxing Academy from scratch. Billy had a tough childhood and got into all sorts of trouble before he found boxing and a great mentor in his coach, Dick Dunn. Billy went on to become a NZ Champion boxer and a successful international motivational speaker.

Billy’s life is now dedicated to helping young men who often have no self-belief and little hope of a decent future. His vision has been realised with many of his young charges radically and positively changing their life styles and local police reporting crime in the area is down 30%.

We have twice hosted Billy at Wellesley where he has shared his story and advice with staff and boys. Billy has definitely come from the ‘wrong side of the tracks’ but through his experiences and personal integrity, he is making a real difference to young boys’ lives. I read his book, ‘Making Champion Men’ over the break and many of his messages profoundly supported my own set of beliefs.

Quite simply, boys need kindness, age and stage appropriate expectations, encouragement, positive role models and to learn the consequences of their actions. This may sound too simplistic but where these fundamental principles are not imbedded in a shared fashion in homes and schools, there is a high risk factor of dysfunctional behaviour.

Once these core principles are in place, personal excellence and empowerment can be achieved. We want to lead our boys to take personal responsibility for their lives.

If we do not provide this structure for success, then when things go wrong, as they inevitably do in life, it’s too easy for young people to blame everyone else for their misfortune or dodge fronting up to their responsibilities.

The small things matter from a young age. Fundamental manners such as saying please and thank you are so important. Looking at people when they speak to you, being warm in greeting and fare-welling people and looking out for those who need help are all good habits to learn at a young age.

Having the confidence to speak up is so much easier in an environment of mutual respect. Swearing and sloppy language creates a lazy speech culture and often even a combative environment. Without  being too pedantic, insistence on correct pronunciation supports the group to build their communication effectiveness.

Boys feel secure when they know there are high expectations of them and a structure of support and discipline. They yearn for, and need acknowledgement and praise but they also need quietly bringing back into line when things go wrong.

A few years ago, former Wellesley parent, John Wright (past NZ cricket captain and later coach) spoke to the boys at our Year 8 Leavers’ Dinner. He shared the poem below with us. He said it has been his ‘rudder’ for life because at the end of the day, we have to be happy to look at ourselves in the mirror and feel happy we have done our best and lived a decent life.

The Man in the Glass

When you get what you want in your struggle for self

And the world makes you king for a day,

Just go to a mirror and look at yourself,

And see what that man has to say.

For it isn't your father or mother or wife,

Who judgment upon you must pass;

The fellow whose verdict counts most in your life

Is the one starring back from the glass.

He's the fellow to please, never mind all the rest.

For he's with you clear up to the end,

And you've passed the most dangerous, difficult test

If the man in the glass is your friend.

You may fool the whole world down the pathway of years.

And get pats on the back as you pass,

But your final reward will be the heartaches and tears

If you've cheated the man in the glass.

Dale Wimbrow (c) 1934

1895-1954

We have a very happy culture at Wellesley where respect for each other is fundamental. The values discussed above are the foundation stone from which we can build the other core competencies that will set the boys up for success.

 

Be Fearless

Over the last 5-10 years there has been an enormous amount of hype in the business and education world around the pace of change and what this means for our young people.

Questions such as:  How do we prepare our young people for a world beyond our imagination? How do we craft a student’s learning journey towards a job that has not yet been created? And how do we measure up against educators around the globe?

These and other questions have been very much part of our staff professional dialogue ensuring we are on top of the debate and are engaging with any new thinking.

Here at Wellesley we are passionate about our holistic philosophy—body, mind and spirit. We squeeze so much into each day for the boys. We regularly debate the ‘pulls’ on the timetable always trying to get the right balance. Our professional development is on-going and relentless. The content of the curriculum delivery is the easy part, it is the how the curriculum is delivered is the key part. Our aim is to infuse the ‘learning how to learn’ principles into the boys so they have the skills and dispositions of life-long learners.

So what are these skills or dispositions and what is the journey we need to take children on to give them real learning power?

They are a collection of attitudes and behaviours. Skills such as perseverance and graft, flexibility, questioning, curiosity, creativity, abstract thinking, reflection, making connections, resourcefulness, resilience and optimism This is not about getting rid of content but going deeper and providing a broader utility. I like Guy Claxton’s metaphor of a school as mind gym v an assembly line. The concept of imagining the mind as a muscle you can build, is appealing.

Teachers are not the font of all knowledge and it is healthy for the children to see them model cheerful ignorance and a desire to learn. We want to prepare our children to become brave new explorers in this exciting fast paced world. Earlier this year, old boy Michael Dobson spoke to some of our Year 7s at a House breakfast. He is 25 years old and after studying at Otago and then the University of California at Berkeley he took on work as a lawyer in Wellington. He recently won a scholarship to study in the USA for his masters in political theory. He told the boys about the many things he loved at Wellesley but the one thing he valued most was being taught to always ask questions, to be curious. He talked about his love of sport but most of all his love of art where he was encouraged to explore and create and to be fearless. He said what he learned in art class was to ignore that little voice we all have in our head, that voice that restricts us to voice our ideas and take the risk of saying it aloud. I want to quote you a small part of what Michael said to the boys.

“I’m extremely excited to live in one of the world’s greatest cities. (New York) And I’m confident I can foot it there. And a lot of that is because of what I learned at Wellesley long ago up some steep steps, in a classroom floating above the school. I learned that there is no such thing as a bad idea, and what I think matters. I believe what you guys think, matters too. So I say be fearless! Whatever you do, do it fearlessly. But—a final word of caution. As important as it is to be fearless, it also matters to be kind.......Don’t ever be mean. It is easy to be mean. Anyone can do it. To be fearlessly kind—that takes real strength.”

To see the Wellesley impact on young men such as Michael is very humbling and motivating for us all. The citizenship and  learning to learn skill set described so far are not new features of the Wellesley philosophy but we are forever honing and reflecting on the best way to facilitate them to our boys.

So we may be on the second half of the chessboard in terms of the exploding rate of change in our world, but we are not concerned because we are determined to provide these young boys with the skill set to not only navigate along with it but be the explorers, explorers with integrity that will create futures for not only the betterment of themselves but for society.